Friday, May 29, 2015

It's Okay to Not Be Okay

It's okay to not be okay.
And flaws don't always have to be fixed.

A semester from hell & moving are over. Back to blogging.

The Natural Beauty and Body Blogger Blog is about to turn 1 year old in about a month. Although based around health, fitness, and nutrition, it also had a meaning to focus on happiness. I have been on my own journey to happiness for a couple years now, and I hoped on my journey I could help others find more happiness too.

Around two years ago things started to turn pretty well for me. My poor health that had left me all but bed ridden for a couple years was getting to be in the best shape in my life, I felt great, I was starting a new job, I was "getting back to life" and leaving my "past life" (both quotes & terms I have used a lot) behind me. Everything I was feeling and doing I wanted more of obviously. All this happiness I never had before. This feeling good & being so positive. I wanted to hold on to it to the point I was either choking it or aspiring to be Ghandi or something. I didn't want to break all the positivity.

There were several things I wanted to let go of and make peace with. I wanted to forgive and understand all the bad things (and some bad people) that had happened to me. Isn't that what I needed to move on? Isn't that what I wanted & should try to achieve? For some reason I have always felt the need to try to understand things, even if I don't agree with them. Probably especially if I don't agree with them. Over a year or two there were a few small things that still annoyed me but weren't affecting me anymore, but a couple big things (okay, really one very big thing) that I just couldn't get over. And I tried so hard. I tried ridiculous things. I tried forgiving people multiple times for things they probably shouldn't have gotten my forgiveness before, because for some reason forgiving that was easier. I tried looking at things a certain way for a few months to see if it would stick & I would get over it, and it didn't. I tried going to therapy. I tried finding answers in places that I should have known I'd never get answers from. Maybe I did know the whole time, but I still tried because I unrealistically wanted to understand something that I probably never will.

Which leads me to the fact: It is okay to not be okay.

So wrapped up in wanting my new life to be peaceful and perfect and happy and all-forgiving, I almost forgot I was living in reality. Reality is obviously flawed, but that doesn't mean it has to be fixed. Bad things will happen, people will be mean. You can't control or fix everything that happens, but you can control your reaction. Or at least most of it. I was hoping & waiting for the time I would just be okay with certain things. In reality though, I will probably never be okay with certain things that happened, but that IS okay. We have the right to not be okay. We have the right to be mad. We have the right to not want to deal with anything again, and the right to move on. I didn't think that still being upset with some things would help me move on, but it wasn't until I accepted that fact that I was able to make more progress than I had in years. About six months ago I somehow made peace with the fact that I wasn't going to get the answers I was looking for, at least in the way I thought I might have received them.

My answers were in time, within myself.
I've been through many painful things in life, but time does heal things like you wouldn't believe. You can see scars, but you can't feel them anymore. You can grow. You can move on. You can be happy.

It feels good to be able to say, I am not okay with what happened, but I am so happy and thankful for where I am now.
You have all this life ahead of you. Use it to be happy. :)

<3,

Samantha Marie

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Designer vs. Drugstore: YSL and Rimmel Face Off

Another Makeup Monday:
"The most coveted VoxBox yet!" is what it declared when I was chosen as an Influenster to receive the new YSL Mascara Volume Effect Faux Cils for testing purposes.



I love mascara. It's probably my 2nd most must-have product to wear daily right after lip gloss. Of course I was stoked to try one from a fabulous YSL line.

"Volume" and "False Lash Effect" are plastered everywhere I try to look up the product online.
I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.

Well... There's some definition, I'll give it that. But volume? Recently this past year I've been wearing Makeup Forever's Smoky Extravagant Mascara which is pretty fabulous. Definitely didn't have near the volume as MUFE. I had tried a Rimmel Mascara for testing sometime last year too, which I had compliments on. I decided to purchase this drugstore brand again which retails around $8 to put head-to-head in a face-off with a brand that I'm sure is going to charge 4 times as much. Here are the results.

Rimmel Accelerator Lash Endless & YSL Volume Effect Mascara vs. My Bare Eye


I took these photos without any other makeup on & used no filters or touch-ups of any kind.
YSL Mascara

Rimmel Mascara

YSL on the right side, Rimmel on the left side

If Rimmel doubled its price to $16 and YSL went on clearance for $8, I'd still buy the Rimmel.

This just goes to show that designer names and a high price point really don't mean anything when it comes to getting what you want out of a product.

Sunday, May 3, 2015

April Product Reviews: EcoTools, Fekkai, SeaRx and More

Finishing cleaning and moving, here are 7 reviews from must-have to meh that have graced my apartment the past few months.
Two EcoTools products - a brand I would have not known about if it wasn't for Influenster. I received the sponge in one of my first VoxBoxes last year, and the brush more recently in another this winter.


I used  the natural sponge in the shower for my facial cleansers. It is a very interesting thing, one kids might want to make a science project out of. Dry, it is pretty hard, and you wonder how your skin is going to handle it. Get it wet though & it turns into an amazingly mushy absorbent fluffy egg that you almost have trouble getting the water out of. Natural, reusable, and cool enough to give as a gift.


The brush I attempted to brush through my hair a few times, but doesn't go well with my naturally curly hair. I suspect for my straight & wavy haired friends that it would be a fabulous addition to your styling collection. Thanks to Influenster, I'm digging this brand & look forward to discovering more things from them.


Sea Rx Micro-dermabrasion Face & Body Scrub - I'm pretty sure I got this in a Birchbox a couple months ago while all my samples were piling up & I never got around to it until now. I was really looking forward to trying this out, being a person who has gotten a professional micro-dermabrasion treatment and knows how amazing the results are first hand. This product however fell flatter than a 9 year old ballerina to me. I did not feel any derm-abrasion, not even on the micro level. I used it wet while in the shower, and it came with no directions. Maybe I needed to use it dry for it to work... with a scrubber... and a machine... But sad-face, I will not venture to get this product on my own in the future.


Fekkai Technician Color care with Grape-seed Oil smells fantabulous. It's supposed to be used as a treatment you leave on 3-5 minutes in the shower then rinse out. It performs terrific as a conditioner, but even better as an overnight mask. I shampoo my hair 2-3xs a week and like saving my overnight masks for when I shampoo at night to rinse out in the morning. Try it out!

Two To-Gos To Keep Around:

Febreeze To-Go
Pick this up for about $1.50 at Target. Use wherever for whenever you want a fresh pick-me-up. Am I alone in thinking Febreeze is slightly ingenious?

Tide-To-Go
I received this in one of my Influenster VoxBoxes last year, the "VowVoxBox" which had a bunch of wedding related things in it. (There was a Sally Hansen Complete Manicure nail polish in a light blue which was god-awful and my first bad review ever, & I love the brand.)



Boscia Pore Purifying Black Strips 
Kind of like the more expensive version of Biore Pore Strips. Same idea, but - I hate to say - as much as I love Boscia skin products, I wasn't impressed with these. Didn't appear to grab as much as I've noticed other pore strips have in the past. Maybe I got lucky with extra clear skin I didn't notice, or didn't leave it on as long as it needed to, but I don't think either of those came in to play. For now - I'll stick with the Boscia cleansers and creams.